It’s 2.39 am and I have no expectation of sleep any time soon such has been the destruction of routine in all of our lives over the past few days. The last week has been surreal, daunting, confusing. The coming weeks and months hold challenges and tragedy of the once in a generation variety. Work for many people (myself included) is not occupying our daily lives at the moment. Certain areas of work are quite the opposite, with the promise of unimaginable pressure and strain to come for the amazing people of our health service. It is impossible to commit to print the gratitude which we collectively owe to the workers in our healthcare sector. The selfless expertise of the people in question will be a constant beacon of light in the deluge of darkness which awaits. The best of people protecting us through the worst of times.

Though, this piece is written about something else entirely, from a totally self-centred perspective. Something which is insignificant in the grander scheme of things. But, life isn’t always about the bigger picture. Life can be about moments. Moments give us our most vivid memories, our rawest releases of emotion. Moments are where we find ourselves doing our purest living. I have spent the past few days wrestling with a lot of aspects of this new reality. Worry for loved ones, for my community, for people in general. Uncertainty has been to the forefront of my mind. I’m uncertain as to when I will be able to visit my parents again, when I will be able to visit friends or have friends visit me, when I will be able to return to the job which I am privileged to do. These are concerns which I’m sure you and everyone else can relate to and I am acutely aware that many many people have more urgent and pressing issues to contend with in a medical, emotional and financial sense.

I’ve also spent quite a bit of time trying to get used to the idea that I conceivably won’t be watching football for a long time to come. The obvious and correct thing to say here is that football should be the last thing on anyone’s mind in the current crisis. Get real. Grow up. While the above sentiment is one hundred per cent true, in the broader context, the fact remains that football is a huge part of many of our lives. I heard football described yesterday as “the most important of the unimportant things”. It has been a constant for me throughout every milestone, every heartache, every struggle and every triumph of my existence to date. It gives our free time structure. It gives a sense of belonging. It gives us something to talk about, something with which we can connect to other people.

The summer of my Leaving Cert will always be linked to the 2010 World Cup in my mind. Liverpool lost a Champions League final the year of my Junior Cert. The day before I started college was spent watching Berbatov score a hat-trick to deny Liverpool a point at Old Trafford. The weekend after I started my first job since finishing college was whiled away pondering how Crystal Palace had left Anfield with three points. One of the highlights of my year spent living in Melbourne was coming out of a pub at 8 am after last year’s Champions League final, singing with supporters from all countries and watching my friend wipe tears of joy from his eyes. I jokingly asked his fiancé how many times she had seen him cry before. She said she never had until now. The point I am trying to make is that for me and many others, football doesn’t exist separately to real life. It is intertwined with it. It compliments it, enriches it, sometimes even gives it meaning. Whether by watching our favourite teams, dissecting and denigrating players performances, or even shuffling around a five-a-side pitch a few times a week, football factors into so many aspects of our lives. Without it, life seems a little sadder. A little lighter on moments.

It’s 3.27 am and I am still none the wiser as to why I started this piece. My best guess is that it is an attempt at catharsis and compartmentalisation. That’s my last bit of clunky alliteration by the way. Pinky promise. We are all aware of the graveness of the situation and the sacrifices to be made in the weeks and months ahead on an everyday level to ensure that life returns to a version of normal as soon as possible. In the meantime, let’s acknowledge that we miss what we miss. Reminisce for now and appreciate later. Because whenever football returns, we will be that much closer to the moments we are missing these days